Nobody tells you it’s allowed to be hard.
The announcements, the baby showers, the way people’s faces light up when they find out — pregnancy is supposed to be a joyful season. And for many women, it is. But for many others, underneath the excitement and the growing belly, there is something quieter and heavier that doesn’t have a name on any greeting card.
Stress. Depression. Fear. A feeling that something is wrong with you for not feeling the way you’re supposed to feel.
If that’s where you are right now, I want to say this plainly: you are not alone, and nothing about this makes you a bad mother. Stress and depression during pregnancy are far more common than the conversation around pregnancy suggests. And God is not absent from this part of it.
Prenatal depression — depression during pregnancy, not just after — affects roughly one in five pregnant women. Anxiety is even more common. Pregnancy changes your body chemistry rapidly, your relationships shift, your future is suddenly full of unknowns, and all of this is happening while you’re expected to glow.
The pressure to feel a certain way can be its own source of suffering. If you’re struggling with stress and depression while pregnant, you may have added a layer of guilt on top of the original weight — guilt that you’re not grateful enough, or that your negative feelings will somehow harm the baby.
Let’s address the miscarriage question directly, because it’s one people are afraid to ask: while severe, unmanaged chronic stress during pregnancy has been associated with some pregnancy complications, occasional or moderate stress is a normal part of life that does not cause miscarriage. If you’re worried about this, talk to your OB — they are your best source of guidance for your specific situation. What I can tell you is that worrying itself is not causing harm. And getting help for depression and anxiety during pregnancy is good for both you and your baby.
Photo by Josh Bean on Unsplash
It doesn’t always look like sadness. Sometimes it looks like:
You don’t need to be experiencing all of these. One or two, persistently, is enough to pay attention to.
For a fuller picture of what these symptoms can look like: Symptoms of Stress, Anxiety, and Depression: How to Know What You’re Facing →
The Bible has a lot to say to women in the middle of difficult, uncertain pregnancies — more than most people realize.
Hagar was pregnant, alone, and fleeing in the wilderness when God found her. Not in a temple. Not in a moment of strong faith. In the desert, at the end of her options. And God spoke to her by name and made a promise over the child she was carrying (Genesis 16:7–13). She named the place where it happened “You are the God who sees me” — El Roi. He saw her when no one else did.
If you feel unseen in your struggle — if your pregnancy feels isolating in a way you can’t explain — that name belongs to you too. You are seen.
“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” — Psalm 139:13–14
This verse is often read for the baby. But it’s also true for the mother. You were knit together. Fearfully and wonderfully made. The God who designed your child is the same God who designed you — including the parts of you that are struggling right now.
“Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” — Isaiah 41:10
Pregnancy can feel like walking into something too big for you. Labor. Parenthood. A future you can’t fully see. “I will uphold you” is a promise made for exactly that kind of moment. Not when you feel ready. Now, while you’re still afraid.
“She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.” — Proverbs 31:25
This isn’t describing a woman who has no fear. It’s describing a woman who has found an anchor that allows her to face an unknown future without being undone by it. That’s not something you manufacture. It’s something you receive — through prayer, through community, through letting God carry what you can’t.
“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” — 1 Peter 5:7
Every anxiety. The ones about the baby’s health. The ones about your relationship. The ones about your body. The ones you’re embarrassed to admit. All of it can be brought to God, not as a sign of weak faith but as an act of it.
Photo by Melanie Rosillo Galvan on Unsplash
Tell your OB or midwife the truth. If you’re experiencing significant stress or depression during your pregnancy, your care provider needs to know. There are safe, evidence-based options for supporting your mental health during pregnancy, and they cannot help you if they don’t know what’s happening.
Find one person to be honest with. Not on social media. One person in your life — a partner, a close friend, your mother, a mentor — who you can tell the real version to. You do not have to carry this invisible.
Get outside your own head when you can. Even briefly. A walk. A phone call with someone who makes you laugh. A church community that doesn’t require you to perform joy you don’t feel.
Pray the honest version. God is not waiting for you to feel better about the pregnancy before He listens. Bring Him the fear, the ambivalence, the questions you’re afraid to ask. He is not surprised or disappointed by any of it.
When you need words and don’t have them: Prayers and Scriptures for Stress and Depression →
If you’re reading this because someone you love is pregnant and not doing well — the best thing you can do is not pretend everything is fine.
You don’t need a perfectly worded speech. You need a question: “How are you actually doing?” And then you need to actually listen to the answer.
A handwritten note that says “I see that this has been hard, and I’m not going anywhere” can be the lifeline someone is waiting for. Not advice. Not Bible verses (unless they’ve asked). Just the acknowledgment that you see them — the real them, not the performance of a glowing pregnancy.
The Handcrafted Encouragement devotional is a natural gift for exactly this season — Scripture-rooted reflections with tear-out pages designed to be given to someone who needs them. For the mother who needs to be reminded she’s not alone. For the friend who wants to say something real but doesn’t know where to start.
See the devotional → — $14.99, free shipping.
You don’t have to feel ready. You don’t have to feel joyful every day. You don’t have to have the anxiety resolved before you can be a good mother.
You just have to keep going — and let people in while you do.
The God who knit your child together in your womb is the same God who is with you in every hard minute of this season. He is El Roi. He sees you. He is not waiting for you to feel better before He shows up.
He’s already here.
For practical, faith-grounded ways to find relief right now: How to Deal with Stress and Depression: 7 Faith-Based Ways →
Go back to the foundation: What the Bible Says About Stress and Depression →
Dwayne Jeffries is a publisher, entrepreneur, and legacy-builder who has dedicated his life to encouraging and equipping others.
As the son of the author of Handcrafted Encouragement, he carries forward the family’s vision—expanding it from a devotional into a living movement that inspires hope, faith, and resilience in everyday life.
For more than two decades, Dwayne has equipped Fortune 500 brands, entrepreneurs, and families to thrive through the shifting tides of business and life.
Known for his intuitive wisdom, strategic foresight, and empathetic leadership, he bridges the gap between timeless spiritual truth and modern challenges with clarity and heart.
At the core of his work is a conviction: true wealth is measured by the lives we impact, the faith we embody, and the legacy we leave behind.
Handcrafted Encouragement is a faith-based devotional designed to bring comfort, hope, and healing through handwritten notes. Rooted in Scripture and empathy, each page encourages you to reflect, connect, and uplift others—one note at a time.
